Thursday, April 17, 2014

I Told You

I told you I would find someone who'd appreciate my care,
He calls me beautiful and amazing every time we're together. 
I told you I would find someone who'd treat me with respect, 
He cooks for me, cares for me, insists that I study and send greetings. 

I knew there had to be someone better out there, 
More mature, more cultured, and selfless.  
Although there are tiny problems in our embrace, 
It feels so good to be loved. 

No feelings, just needs. 
Hugs, hugs, hugs. 
No kisses, no misses. 
Hand to hand to arm. 

I am very lucky to find a lover, at last. 
A lover who loves me and not leave me cold. 
But I am the problem. 
I wish for another. But the other is ice who has never blinked twice.
At me. 

Leave he will, by 2015 gone. 
What will I do with my lonesome self then?
I don't think I can find another lover
As sweet and gentle as my Lindo. 

I'll have my room, unhappy with insecurity,
No one to hug in a soothing exchange of affection. 
Infection. Infection. 
I'm sorry I've been hit with apathy. 

I feel guilt for my neutrality towards you,
Yet relieved I did not fall for another goer. 
Confused, I thought I'll almost always love people I loved. 
Grateful, for your kindness, patience, and altruism. 

Fairly certain our personalities isn't the best fit, 
But good is good enough these days, isn't it?
I love you, my wonderful man. 
But I don't love you. 

I would have by now,
Maybe if you change. 
More room, less bother, less back, more slack. 
Not too cold now but it's a little hot. 

I've always preferred my food cool to warm. 
I've always been lazy to microwave. 
I've always liked autumn more than spring. 
I've normally been more laissez-faire than anything. 

So nice, so sweet, so true, 
"I'm happy to have meet you."
"I'm happy that you use Tinder."
"You're so amazing!"

Too kind, blind, but it's fine.
Extremes of cruelty and flattery, 
I'll take the latter. 
You make me well.

My sweetie pie, I'm sorry I do not love you nor own you. 
I'm sorry I do not miss you nor want to. 
I am safe. No stakes. Not wroughtten.
Bebe. Let's just enjoy the moment. 


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