Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Highs and lows

The picture above is a "graph" drawn by my english teacher. He said that every person who moves to a new country will experience this slope. B stands for beginning and E for end. He explained that when you first go to a new country, you're usually optimistic and you have great expectations for the future in the first few weeks. Your happiness level begins to drop when you discover the ugly side of the new place, problems begin to surface and now you're not having such a good time. The point in the middle is when you hit rock bottom, when you feel so low and so down and depressed. But over time things will pick up and you're life will start climbing, that is, if you decide not to return to the country you were in prior to the present one.

Then he asked at what level I was at and I rubbed off the area with my finger and he marked it with a line and wrote "I am here".

"So Zoe, you know where you are and you know that there are more to come."
*nods head*

I agree and disagree with this "new country mood-mometer" I mean, isn't our whole life like a wave? It goes up and down, successes, failures, achievements and setbacks and up and down. So, I guess what he meant was that the feeling was more apparent when we're in a new/unfamiliar environment.

What I believe is we can take control of our environment by the way we react to people. But I've been noticing this awful pattern and I don't know whether it's just human to have conflicts or if it's me. I wonder how I make people feel sometimes because the way they make me feel is frustrated and they really drive me up the wall when they can't understand what they're saying themselves. Wherever I go, I'm always wishing the same thing. I always hope that I could live by myself, on my own without a bother or a speck or irritant in my life.

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