Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Look who's talking.

I have this irritation spot when meeting new people. The first thing they always notice is my accent. Fo' shizzle they'll ask, "So are you local?" or "Where are you from?" Then I'll give a forced smile and ask them to guess to roughly estimate their I.Q. or general knowledge.

I've gotten a lot of dubious answers. Seems like the only country they know is Amelica. Yeah, I had a few saying Australia or England for their second choice. Obviously, they can't tell the difference between an English, Australian or American accent. They just know it's foreign and most probably Western. I even had one that answered China. Way to go.

What gets me more pissed is when people asked why my accent hasn't change. I haven't realized that either, I've been in Singapore for 3 years and in Malaysia for 5. One person (ahem Yeehoe) would batter me by repeating my sentences in an Malaysian accent and make me follow. O gawd, the pain.

First thing I wonder is, why the hell would I want a Malaysian accent? Not to put you guys down or anything, it's part of your 'culture' eh, nationality so I'm not discriminating. Why the hell would I wanna pronounce photographer as photo-grapher when it's supposed to be enunciated as pho-tog-rapher.

Like I said, no offence. Many words are mispronounced if I were to follow the horrid accent, the wrong pitch in a bad speech. I'd rather be mute and learn sign language. Hearing other people read disturbs me, especially when someone steps on stage and they start talking really confidently oblivious to their verbal errors.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not fantastic in public speaking or know every word in the dictionary but if you wanna step on my toes about my accent, you really should listen to yours. An Indonesian girl was laughing at me for the way I spoke. It was really hard for me ignore 'cus I'm telling you, I was gonna insult her so badly. She has an Indonesian accent, small English vocabulary, unable to form a simple proper sentence in English.

I just gave her a really patronizing look. I didn't wanna be so serious anyways, she was after all, my cell group mate and sowing seeds of sarcasm wouldn't be such a good idea. I don't even talk to her anymore. The way you talk influences people.

I remember my cousins graduated in the U.K. and they came back to J.B. and when we were conversing, I started talking really weirdly. It took me a moment to talk straight. Same goes for me, I've had a handful of new people either intimidated by my accent or unknowingly influenced and spoke in a strange tone.

Been there, I totally understand. I get intimidated by people smarter than me, prettier than me, popular than me. I know I'm not a genius, drop-dead gorgeous or very well-known. I just want to reach my full potential of everything I have.

My e-mail, when people ask for it over the phone and I give it. "Missyve," I would say.
"I'm sorry, what?"
"Miss."
"M..."
"I-S-S," continuing "Yve, Y-V-E."
"Har? What's that?"
"My middle name. Dash."
"Meeezyev-e... not underscore?"
"Yes, dash (-)."

Makes me feel like making an e-mail address like piss0ff_mlm@hotmail.com. You'll believe me now when I spell out my address for you, wontcha? Not wanting to be rude, I didn't shout, "I THINK I KNOW THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A DASH AND AN UNDERSCORE." Nor do I want to hang up the phone and ruin the friendly vibe. I know, major attitude problem. I'm working on it, STILL PRAYING!

FAQs (reread, not FAGS), I hate them. I was asked the same question for hundreds of times. I don't even wanna tell people I'm homeschooled anymore 'cus immediately they'll ask how it works and the whole 'annual examination interrogation' proceeds. Why don't you just bloody type Homeschool in Wikipedia and get yourself some extra knowledge than bugging people with dumb questions.

One last complaint. I promise(for this entry). People say rubber when they're referring to an eraser. They ask you to buy Pampers for your baby rather than diapers. What's up with the whole branding? This American I met last year told me that in America they asked what flavored Coke they wanted. As in, what soft drink would they want.

It's so commercialized, advertisements are brainwashers. I tell you to buy a new cellphone, not "buy a Nokia/Sony Ericsson." "Pass me my phone please" not pass me that compact-device-that-is-able-to-receive-and-send-calls-and-messages-and-has-a-2-megapixel-camera-built-in-it. The next time you wanna call an object by it's material, care to enlighten me on all the elements as well.

All I'm saying is that it ain't so hard saying eraser. Making excuses for your sucky sentences, copying other people's words that you can't comprehend and laughing at others really shows a lot. I don't want to continue misusing a word if I have mistaken it's definition, I wouldn't mind people correcting me, teaching me to improve myself. I just don't get why they can't admit it and work harder if they wanna use this language so much.

Kthxbai.

12 comments:

Halobenzene said...

I get the same thing when I'm in Singapore. Apparently a Singlish-free accent is very strange there.

Dialogues tend to go like this:

X: "Where are you from? You don't sound Singaporean."

Me: "Orh becos I dun tok liddis arr? And then like use all the werds like 'liao' and 'la' and 'le' izzit?"

Cindy Khor said...

ooo... i think i need to brush up on my english too... there was once when i was talking to my irish friends and wanted to ask for pain-killers and the sentence "do you have any panadol" just came out and they were like "what?" and then only i knew that i'd a major problem with using the correct english...

thanks for the reminder..

DanSquirrels said...

One word: Amen.

Jeffro said...

hahaha.. this makes me think..
i've nvr asked you that question did i?

nways.. no matter how you sound like, with accent or not, Zoe is Zoe.. and Zoe is my friend.. XD

-eythang nerd- said...

HARROW ZOE! hahha

this post is .. gosh... rants and rants...

xD

anyway come online la... so long x c u... n put a cbox. it feels weird leaving a message @ the comment section. ahha

Nigel - blog.flymenigel.com

humorboy said...

haha there's a saying, if u can't beat them, join them XD

Missyve said...

Halobenzene- LOL, when I first enrolled into a primary school there they thought I was the queen of English which I wasn't.

They lack a lot of cultural knowledge I guess.

Cindy- Hahah, it's alright, I feel like such a beech nao :S It's better than saying, "Have any morphine?"

DanSquirrel- Praise God? :D

Jeffro- Aww! I :heart: YOU!! Yeah, it's great you didn't. You'd be the 102nd.

Unflyguy- Hahaha, well, I was ANNOYED. Like, get some brains PEPUL! Cboxes are prone to spams which really is unnecessary.

humorboy- ehhh.. what are you referring to?

Corynn said...

You should say 'eh' more. That way people will know you are Canadian. :)

Missyve said...

Hahaha, you're like the second person to say that OMG! I forgot how they said it already, I left when I was 8 but my accent never left me. Thank God for that.

Cow that Bite! said...

thanks god i didnt ask you that question! And didnt know you get so annoyed by that question. Make me wonder "Zoe iz scary > <" "can i get along with Zoe as i dont speak proper english?" after reading this post of yours. i understand that feeling as some elders tend to ask me the same question over and over again everytime we meet > <. So maybe you should create a full detail of "about me" page so next time just give them the url when they ask. =D

I hope you dont mind me speak out my own opinion on you, you may delete if you feel like to.

you do have different accent. my guess was you're from england =D as i really do not know whats a canadian accent sound like.

so, knowing you are came from other country, i thought you enroll in international school and i am wrong. 1st time in my life knowing someone who are homeschooling.

I dare not to ask you but i got my answer from others. =D

about pronunciation. every country has their own way of pronouncing influence by their own cultures and environment. I mean there is different between Canadian english, American english and Cockney english, right?
Leave alone with the language i am familar with, Mandarin. I can tell you i am not speaking the proper Mandarin also as it already mixed up with other Mandarin dialect under environment influence.

it is not enough at least we understand what's others' are talking/speaking? rather than correcting them and make your own life miserable? (different if someone who willing to listen and make changes)

Anyway, nice meeting you la~

P.S:you not gonna put this up and start shooting me in your blog, right? =P please dont. spare me! MERCY!

P.S.S:if possible delete this and reply me in email. =D vistacrew@vista-crew.com

Cow that Bite! said...

thanks god i didnt ask you that question! And didnt know you get so annoyed by that question. Make me wonder "Zoe iz scary > <" "can i get along with Zoe as i dont speak proper english?" after reading this post of yours. i understand that feeling as some elders tend to ask me the same question over and over again everytime we meet > <. So maybe you should create a full detail of "about me" page so next time just give them the url when they ask. =D

I hope you dont mind me speak out my own opinion on you, you may delete if you feel like to.

you do have different accent. my guess was you're from england =D as i really do not know whats a canadian accent sound like.

so, knowing you are came from other country, i thought you enroll in international school and i am wrong. 1st time in my life knowing someone who are homeschooling.

I dare not to ask you but i got my answer from others. =D

about pronunciation. every country has their own way of pronouncing influence by their own cultures and environment. I mean there is different between Canadian english, American english and Cockney english, right?
Leave alone with the language i am familar with, Mandarin. I can tell you i am not speaking the proper Mandarin also as it already mixed up with other Mandarin dialect under environment influence.

it is not enough at least we understand what's others' are talking/speaking? rather than correcting them and make your own life miserable? (different if someone who willing to listen and make changes)

Anyway, nice meeting you la~

P.S:you not gonna put this up and start shooting me in your blog, right? =P please dont. spare me! MERCY!

P.S.S:if possible delete this and reply me in email. =D vistacrew@vista-crew.com

Jeffro said...

@Zoe: *winks* Well then Im lucky to be one of the others who didn't make any guesses.. =D